elementalhero: NO PANTS (ξdisney | all the ellipses)
I just had a 52-hour work week.

/sleeps forever

In other news, I've apped Juudai at Zodion, because a.) the YGO cast asked me to (;~~~; omg you guys i have friends) and b.) I throw him into a zillion sex memes anyway, I might as well take it up a notch and toss him into a sex game. (Is it terrible that I've written more graphic sex with my TV-Y7 muse than with all my adult/young adult muses combined? Yes, it probably is. B) )


Jun. 14th, 2011 12:49 pm
elementalhero: NO PANTS (ξnno | FUCK YOU OWL)
Heading into my second week of work. I'm feeling a lot less MELODRAMATICALLY MISERABLE about it as compared to last year... maybe this means I am Growing Up and such and being less of a Juvenile Drama Queen about - gasp - having a crappy job (which maybe like idk 70% of adults in the world have to deal with, too).

Tumblr, roleplay, and Yu-Gi-Oh have all been keeping me sane. I Skyped with [livejournal.com profile] anzila on Friday night and I watched the first episode of 5D's, which was... unironically hilarious. Haven't moved on any farther yet, but LMAO A PINK CHICKEN AND A ROBOT HOBO ARE YOUR BEST CARDS, YUUSEI? REALLY? KIND OF ADORABLE IN A SAD WAY (OR SAD IN AN ADORABLE WAY). Anzy and I also had discussions ranging from The Looming Specter of the Career World to making up wacky headcanon for GX (we have determined that Juudai's one weakness is tennis. It's his kryptonite.) and all was fun.

I might have to Skype more often - it's just that my Skype name is my real name (I originally made it with an eye towards college and RL applications, like my Facebook page, and never expected to use it with my fandom friends) so I might need to make a second one for Internet derpery. I like keeping my RL social networking and my fun internet social networking separate. Maybe one day, the worlds will merge. But that day is not today.

/an update

oh hi

Jun. 7th, 2011 01:22 pm
elementalhero: NO PANTS (ξkh | riku calls bullshit)
I swore I wouldn't, but the economy is a bitch. I'm going back to Offset.

Cons: horrific misery for another summer again.

Pros: money.

I am such a sellout.
elementalhero: NO PANTS (ξhp | awkward blast-ended skrewt)
Man, I have been neglecting this journal. HI GUYS REMEMBER ME?

In addition to constantly being on Plurk, I now have a new timesink to in which to flush the remaining days of my waning youth: I now have a Tumblr, which I mostly made to more efficiently follow the roughly 20 Yu-Gi-Oh! tumblrs that I've been checking manually every day.

So yeah, I've given up pretending that it's a phase, and openly admitted that YGO's my new fandom. Probably be spamming it for a long time, I guess. I don't know how these things happen. :V


In RL: bleeeeaaaaaaaarrrrrgh my life is so boringly boring. Almost got an internship but not quite (don't feel like rehashing the story), so now my summer will probably consist of working at a summer camp and trying to write more original fiction and begin amassing a portfolio. Anything but Offset again.

Finals in one week and then I get to do the summer thing \o/
elementalhero: NO PANTS (ξcg | when I offer you survival)
So, back at school now. Trying to obtain some of my older course books for free on the internet (i.e. Communist Manifesto, Nietzsche, etc) so I don't have to pay too much. Ahahah, that's a pipe dream, isn't it? anyway.

I don't really think I've been doing things interesting enough to warrant LJing about them (the most interesting things are also things I don't really want on the Internet in public places, if you follow me). Mostly whining IRL about going back to Offset for two weeks - I needed the money, but not the emotional painnnnnnn. Happy to be back with my friends, less happy to be back with Taylor Swift (aka third suitemate, if you were following my drama back in October and November).

RPing like a mad thing. I keep apping new characters. I may grow to hate myself - lol oh wait. No, seriously, RP is the only thing that keeps me sane nowadays.

Mostly, I've just been hiding my face from the looming specter of ADULTHOOOOOD. I have many important things to do this semester which will help pave the way for my future etc. etc. etc. Also I have to find an internship for the summer or I will kill myself. Also also I'm going to Japan in September holy shit I don't think I am ready aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah. SO yeah. Much emoing.

Oh, and my roommate got me volume 53 of Naruto in the original Japanese for Christmas. *___* it's the one with BABY SASUKE AND CHIBITACHI AAAAAAH.
elementalhero: NO PANTS (ξhp | beyond the sky)
Okay, for the past two days in a row, I have had those absurd compound-complex dreams in which I wake up and am still dreaming and then I wake up for real. I have never had such dreams previously, and I'm not sure if I can blame Inception, because I saw it weeks ago.

Last night's was also some kind of textbook anxiety dream with all the anxiety symptoms, which included my teeth falling out. (That's supposed to be symbolic of fear of change/losing potency? which I only know from The Tommyknockers to begin with...) Although what's interesting about last night's is that I was trying to report to the school authorities that I was a victim of stalking/sexual harassment by this creepy guy who chased me down the hill to my Economics class (a class which I have never taken) and tried to lift my skirt, but in the dream, I couldn't remember how I got from the Econ class to reporting the guy chasing me, and I realized that I must have dreamed the guy, so I apologized to Campus Safety and said I had realized that never happened, I only dreamed it, but I might not have so maybe keep an eye out for the guy, and they nodded and sympathized with me. Then I woke up for real and was like "what the heck 0__o" In between that, I was in a public bathroom and overheard the president of the college plotting with a mob boss to murder his wife, but they found out I was listening, and they made me promise not to tell or I would be expelled. I had an extreme moral crisis, but then my teeth started falling out until my mouth was full of lose teeth (more than could possibly have fit in my jaw) and I had to clench my lips shut so I didn't lose any until I could get to a dentist to fix them. It was so bizarre. Perhaps my anticipation of finally not having to work in the hellhole that is OPM translated itself into life-transition anxiety?

In related-yet-other news, I am gearing my muses up to return to the wonderful world of RP, which I have missed like an ache in my soul for nine weeks of my life ;~~~; I was a bit chagrined and upset at first to see that Sasuke was reserved at Squarewarts by someone other then me while I was away, but I am determined to make the best of it. There is always museboxing, and far be it from me to deny another person the exquisite joy of playing that emo derpface. And hey, they might change their mind. Nym's reserved Blue and I have reserved Silver, so they will be making their triumphant, street-rat return to the halls of Hogwarts pretty soon. 8D

The most notable of my changes in muse roster at SW is that I have decided not to pick Ruby up again. Instead, I was bitten reeeaaally hard by a new muse... his dad. |D Yup, I intend to play Norman as an angry maverick Gym-Leader-turned-Phys-Ed-teacher with a delinquent son who's currently running around saving the world from global warming with his tiny girlfriend. Ruby-muse was not happy with me, but I think he'll get over it, as I am picking him up at [livejournal.com profile] counted_stars to play with his dad as played by the lovely [livejournal.com profile] connie_connike, who I met via dear_mun and who is ABSOLUTELY FABULOUS. I am also vibrating with the anticipation of playing my favorite [livejournal.com profile] dramatic_cape back at Kannagara. 8D I will be running crazy with apps and reapps next week, but it is so worth it.

Alright! Getting psyched up! ONE MORE DAY!!!!
elementalhero: NO PANTS (ξdisney | it's a piece of cake)
I feel this most accurately describes my feelings:

elementalhero: NO PANTS (ξstock | ink is running toward the page)
I am about to say three words. Before I say them, you should know this has nothing to do with the actual content of the The Girl Who ____ books, because I never wish to read them, based purely on the awful pain and suffering I have endured on their stupid account. I am sure there are many people who enjoy them.

That said, those three words are:


Screw his stupid books which have become stupidly popular in a stupidly short amount of time. Screw the awful-grade paper they are printed on, which jams the machines and slices my fingers into mincemeat. Screw his stupid relatives, who have pushed his unpublished manuscripts into being published because his will stipulated that they'd get all his assets which includes any future book royalties. Screw their obnoxious naming convention that makes their titles obnoxious to say whenever we glance at the schedule and moan, "shitfuck, we're doing The Girl Who Clusterfucked the Mass-Market Paperback Industry again." And screw his boring, tasteless, paper-dry writing style, which I had to stare at for a whole week about a month ago while I was trapped on the automation line, hating my life and waiting to die from some sort of tragic foot-pain-related condition.

...That was building up inside me for a while. Sorry.
elementalhero: NO PANTS (ξポケモン | and live in harmony harmony)
Work was so weird today. I had to scrub dirt off the walls for two hours because execs from our parent company back in Germany are coming to check the plant and do executive things, and of course we have to pretend that this factory isn't coated in a layer of grime a half-inch deep. I am not exaggerating. Two hours. Dirt off walls. I am not making this shit up.

But then I made a playdate lunch date with a nice girl I've been talking to; we're going to skip out during dinner break tomorrow to zip up to her barn (only like three miles away) so she can show me her horses. Me + horses = childlike squealing and glee. I ALWAYS WANTED A RAINBOW PONY AS A CHILD, OKAY. So, basically, yeah, today was just like "wat is going on."

I am stuck in Pokemon Sapphire! I can't figure out how to get Rock Smash and I keep trying to talk to the girl on the Verdanturf side of the Rusturf Tunnel to tell me how to get it so I can reunite her with her stupid boyfriend and she just keeps telling me all "HE'S SO NOBLE, DIGGING A MILE-LONG TUNNEL WITH HIS BARE HANDS, WHICH IS A TOTAL TURN-ON FOR ME," and I am like YOU'RE DUMB, HE'S RIGHT THERE, IF YOU WOULD GIVE ME THE GODDAMN HM I CAN SMASH THESE ROCKS AND BE DONE WITH YOU. Ugh. also I am addicted to Contests *w* GROW FASTER, BERRIES!

I am like vibrating with excitement for Kannagara's fourth wall event because I can just be like SCREW HIATUS, I AM SPAMMING PEOPLE WITH MY LOVE AND DEVOTION. Two weeks left. Two more weeks in purgatory. I can do this. /cries
elementalhero: NO PANTS (ξcg | these deep solitudes)
I miss college. I am reaching the point where I am starting to wonder if the whole thing wasn't just a very detailed, lengthy lucid dream I had. The nightmare I had last week is weighing heavily on my mind. I hate this job. Not even the work itself is the worst, though it is awful - no, what I hate is what I feel I am losing. Creativity. Drive. Days of life. This is my last year as a "teenager," and I have barely seen the sun so far. You start to realize how people can spend thirty-five years working this shit job in this shit place, and that's because you get so tired, so worn, so hurt, that it's easier to sit and stay than to get up and run and never come back.

I want to go out somewhere. I want to do all the stupid, ill-advised things I've spent my entire life being too sensible to do. I want to laugh and run and hope and reach out and grasp the stars in my fist. When Sean and I were dating the winter of my junior year, he promised me that he'd show me how to break into the middle school and climb onto the roof once summer came. We broke up in February and that never happened, obviously. I wish it had happened. I wish I could just get out. Eight months away at school and I'd managed to forget how stifling this town is, how stunted your dreams become because of the size of the planter they're grown in. It's worse because I feel like I caught a whiff, a taste of the Big Wide Open World, before coming back here and chaining myself to this job.

I'm quitting after the first week in August. I'm squeezing a summer into those three weeks thereafter, and then I go back to school. I'm not stuck here. I'm not going to be working at Offset forever. But it feels like I am. Deep in my heart, it feels like the past six-seven weeks have been a lifetime, and I've got another lifetime ahead before it's done. I can't imagine what it's like not to have an escape route. When you're little, and your parents say that education will open doors, you don't realize what they mean because you've never gotten a glimpse of what it's like to be stuck behind when the doors shut. I've seen it. It scares the fucking shit out of me. I try to commiserate with my mom, but she has little sympathy for me. I can't honestly blame her. I've had a great life. I'm not going to be throwing bundles for thirty-five years. I know all this. But there's knowing and then there's feeling, and right now, I feel a nameless terror at the sight of adulthood, nearing and leering ever closer to me. My feet ache. My shoulders ache. My head aches. My heart aches. I can barely write anymore.

At this point, I don't even give a shit about the money. I want out. I want out.
elementalhero: NO PANTS (ξfilm | i do not like the cone of shame)
My chorus concert is tomorrow. After that, I don't have to set up those godforsaken risers again until December or so. Thank god.

nnngh but i have a project to do by Friday and also a History test on Wednesday that I absolutely have to do well on or else I'm in deep shit and the tests in that class are hideous, evil, twisted malign sentient demons that know all the secrets of your soul, and they hate you. /crais

Also I need more friends IRL and online that I can talk to about Code Geass. It's all built up inside me, and I'm like YOU GUYS I NEED TO HAVE SOME SORT OF CATHARTIC RELEASE FOR ALL THIS ~EMOOOOOOOTION~ and it's like, "yeah, Random, everyone watched that show a year ago." This is probably karma getting back at me for when I read Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows in one day, and then everyone around me took longer, and then there was the one friend who took like an entire month to read it, and by then I was sick of talking about it. SOB IS THERE NO END TO THIS CIRCLE OF HATRED AND BAD FANDOM TIMING?

Three more weeks until I never have to deal with my roommate's passive aggression ever again. aaaaahhhh~


Mar. 9th, 2010 01:37 pm
elementalhero: NO PANTS (Sasuke [broken])
Rejected from being an RA.

Also, I looked back at the guidelines for applying at the Writing Center, and I have to send in two essays as writing samples from two different classes. Problem: I can only send one essay from my Tragedies class, and I have only written two other papers for two other classes last semester, and they were both terrible. It'll have to be the CORE Japan one, because the sociology paper was just so bad I don't want to think about it. But the CORE Japan one has charts. Will they accept it if it has charts? /worried

And I have to get a copy of my official transcript. I don't know where to get it! Looks like tonight will be another "running around like a complete derp" night. SIGH. It's due by 5 pm on Thursday and the materials all have to be printed out andd sealed in an envelope. I also have no envelope. And I have to study for my History midterm tomorrow.

elementalhero: NO PANTS (Default)

Time to stop being such a bum and ACTUALLY POST ABOUT MY REAL LIFE HOMG.

Well, the entire past week was spent with me cleaning every inch of my house in preparation for my Big Grad Bash on Saturday.  And by me cleaning, I mean my family cleaning and me making small contributions but mostly RPing.  *fails, is a bum*

Saturday: EVERY MEMBER OF MY ENTIRE REALLY BIG FAMILY COMES TO MY HOUSE.  We rented a tent and a Port-A-John and a keg of Coors Light (for the adults, ahaha) and everything.  Luckily, I got to invite my buddies and have fun that way.  Unluckily, it pretty much rained about half the time and we never got to roast marshmallows like I wanted to.  Then we went to my basement and played Guitar Hero after everyone left and then we fell asleep stayed up until 5:30 (unless you were [livejournal.com profile] chocomarauder, in which case you fell asleep).

Sunday: Everyone went home, I took [livejournal.com profile] chocomarauder  to church with me, and the we rested for two hours before piling into the car to go to EB's house (one of my friends who was at my party on Sat.) for HER graduation party.  XD  Hers was more fun, because it was gorgeous all day and we had a Slip'N'Slide (hence the grass) and we got to roast marshmallows and run around the woods and roll down her hill until we failed to tumble forward correctly and slammed into the ground on our right kidney and believed for a full thirty seconds that we had been paralyzed from the waist down.  Well, that last part was just me.  Also, lots and lots of cake.  Ughghlgh I am going to be fat.


Monday: Spent morning in pajamas while coloring in coloring books and watching Spongebob with EB and [livejournal.com profile] chocomarauder , no lie.  Went home, walked dog, spent a nice afternoon/evening hanging out with my daddy.

Today: Finally sent in course paperwork for college (!!!!!!!!!!) after a grueling four hours of squalling infants, wailing toddlers, and ringing phones.  It's a good thing I love books so much.



I was one of the lucky few people to get a four-person suite on the first floor in my hall!!!  But that's not the best part!  I managed to contact my roommate via Facebook last night.  She's from South Korea!  SO COOL!  And she seems really friendly and I am totally excited, eeeee~



elementalhero: NO PANTS (Default)

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