elementalhero: NO PANTS (ξhp | awkward blast-ended skrewt)
Man, I have been neglecting this journal. HI GUYS REMEMBER ME?

In addition to constantly being on Plurk, I now have a new timesink to in which to flush the remaining days of my waning youth: I now have a Tumblr, which I mostly made to more efficiently follow the roughly 20 Yu-Gi-Oh! tumblrs that I've been checking manually every day.

So yeah, I've given up pretending that it's a phase, and openly admitted that YGO's my new fandom. Probably be spamming it for a long time, I guess. I don't know how these things happen. :V

DID YOU GUYS SEE THE NEWEST HARRY POTTER TRAILER??? /froths at mouth

In RL: bleeeeaaaaaaaarrrrrgh my life is so boringly boring. Almost got an internship but not quite (don't feel like rehashing the story), so now my summer will probably consist of working at a summer camp and trying to write more original fiction and begin amassing a portfolio. Anything but Offset again.

Finals in one week and then I get to do the summer thing \o/
elementalhero: NO PANTS (ξgx | console me in my darkest hour)
Well, that was the most disappointing spring break ever. No RL friends, no movies I wanted to see (until Limitless came in on Friday, but then I was busy with family and couldn't go /rage), and no downloading all those subbed episodes of GX because the site went down five days before I could get home to my limit-free wireless (/RAGE).

On the plus side, I got to walk my dog four miles every day. And before you think that's my sarcasm talking, no, I actually took her that far on purpose, just to get out of my house. D'|

also, I counted up my GX icons and they outnumber my Star Driver icons. OH FFFUUUU I WAS GONNA CATCH UP ON STAR DRIVER THIS WEEK AND I NEVER DID DAMMIT.

But the week was not without nice things, I suppose, as I did get a lot of sleep and I beat Pokemon White (*o*) and I made a new friend (Welcome to my flist, [livejournal.com profile] aphotic!), and I got a haircut. My hair needed it.


...rereading this and wow, my life is boring.
elementalhero: NO PANTS (ξcg | these deep solitudes)
I miss college. I am reaching the point where I am starting to wonder if the whole thing wasn't just a very detailed, lengthy lucid dream I had. The nightmare I had last week is weighing heavily on my mind. I hate this job. Not even the work itself is the worst, though it is awful - no, what I hate is what I feel I am losing. Creativity. Drive. Days of life. This is my last year as a "teenager," and I have barely seen the sun so far. You start to realize how people can spend thirty-five years working this shit job in this shit place, and that's because you get so tired, so worn, so hurt, that it's easier to sit and stay than to get up and run and never come back.

I want to go out somewhere. I want to do all the stupid, ill-advised things I've spent my entire life being too sensible to do. I want to laugh and run and hope and reach out and grasp the stars in my fist. When Sean and I were dating the winter of my junior year, he promised me that he'd show me how to break into the middle school and climb onto the roof once summer came. We broke up in February and that never happened, obviously. I wish it had happened. I wish I could just get out. Eight months away at school and I'd managed to forget how stifling this town is, how stunted your dreams become because of the size of the planter they're grown in. It's worse because I feel like I caught a whiff, a taste of the Big Wide Open World, before coming back here and chaining myself to this job.

I'm quitting after the first week in August. I'm squeezing a summer into those three weeks thereafter, and then I go back to school. I'm not stuck here. I'm not going to be working at Offset forever. But it feels like I am. Deep in my heart, it feels like the past six-seven weeks have been a lifetime, and I've got another lifetime ahead before it's done. I can't imagine what it's like not to have an escape route. When you're little, and your parents say that education will open doors, you don't realize what they mean because you've never gotten a glimpse of what it's like to be stuck behind when the doors shut. I've seen it. It scares the fucking shit out of me. I try to commiserate with my mom, but she has little sympathy for me. I can't honestly blame her. I've had a great life. I'm not going to be throwing bundles for thirty-five years. I know all this. But there's knowing and then there's feeling, and right now, I feel a nameless terror at the sight of adulthood, nearing and leering ever closer to me. My feet ache. My shoulders ache. My head aches. My heart aches. I can barely write anymore.

At this point, I don't even give a shit about the money. I want out. I want out.
elementalhero: NO PANTS (Kingdom Hearts [Aqua])
Comment with a pairing and I'll tell you:

1. When I started shipping them
2. What I think their challenge is
3. What makes me happy about them
4. What makes me sad about them
5. What moment I wish had never happened
6. Who I'd be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other
7. My happily ever after for them



IN OTHER NEWS: Lately I've been feeling like I want to delete all my icons and reupload them from scratch, in the process creating a new naming system for the whole bunch of them. My only problem with this is, then all my old posts and comments would just show the default, and I would be like AN ENTIRE YEAR'S WORTH OF ICON DERPERY, DOWN THE TUBES D: but at the same time, I'm tired of some and want to rename others and I kind of have this urge to just purge and start all over again. SIGH.


Oh, and one of tomorrow's midterms got pushed back to Monday, yeeeaaaaah BD

I'm bored, spam me with chatter. :/ (granted, by the time anyone comments, I will probably no longer be bored ahaha)


...I also probably need to rework and reorganize my obscene number of entry tags, too, sob.

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