Another Irish Drinking Song

Sasuke has a virus.

I can't believe it.

I'm posting this from work.

I really can't be sure of what it is, but it's a program that got onto the laptop--I don't know HOW--and pretends to be a spyware-removal program.  I think it's a virus because it pops up in the windows sidebar like it's a windows security thing, but it has a whole bunch of grammatical errors that Microsoft would never commit and the little icon isn't the red shield with an X, it's a red dot with an X that wants to look like the Windows shield.

I feel sick to my stomach and I can't stop thinking about it.  If my laptop goes, I'm shit-fracked.  There is no possible way for me to continue this school year using the family desktop, which may have an unrelated virus of its own.

McAfee claims to have quarantined it, but I can't be sure.  I shut off the laptop's wireless adapter to try to contain the damage.  I don't know what the program/virus actually does.

If my parents find out, I'm completely dead.

Help?